thequeervet:

theriverscribe:

thequeervet:

I remember this snippet. I wrote it after a talk with @theriverscribe one day. I don’t remember what we were talking about, I just know it spawned this Loki – Gabriel – Sam weird fic idea with this:

“Can’t you see what you’re doing to him? That boy out there
is so damn convinced he’s worth nothing.”
Loki snarled out. He took a furious step towards Gabriel and jabbed a finger at
him. “You helped make him like that. Instead of growing a damn pair of balls
and stepping up to the plate, you’ve been hurting him just as much as everyone
else. He’s our mate! You’re supposed to be protecting
him!”

“Now wait just a …”

Loki didn’t even look at Dean as he pointed a finger his
way. “Don’t you even start with me, boy.
You’re just as guilty as he is, here.” He brought his hand back and then
surprised them by using it to shove Gabriel back a step. “Quit being such a
damn coward!”

This time it was Gabriel who was snarling. “Back off.” Power flashed, hot and dark
in his eyes. “Our timelines aren’t the same and you know it. Just because you
got your happy ending with your Sam doesn’t mean anything for this timeline.”

“Are you sure about that? Or is that just what you’re afraid
of?” Loki shot back. He crossed his arms over his chest and never once stopped
glaring. “I’ve half a mind to scoop him up and take him back with me. My Sammy
wouldn’t mind. At least there he’d be appreciated and cared for instead of
ridiculed and tortured.” The flash of power in Gabriel’s eyes at that only made
Loki let out a huff of breath that might’ve been a laugh. It certainly made his
grin a bit more smug.

Dean, however, had finally had enough. “You’re not taking my
brother!”

When Loki turned to him, his eyes were cold. One eyebrow was
arched up in a look of disbelief. “Oh, now
you care?”

“Of course I care. He’s my brother!”

“Then act like it.”
The venomous look that Loki gave them all had the whole room going silent. Even
Gabriel was still, watching carefully as his alternate self practically hissed
his fury at them. Shaking his head, Loki looked back and forth between them
all. “Do any of you even see how bad he has it? How depressed he is? He’s
taking freaking anti-anxiety meds, for Dad’s sake! He barely makes it through a
day with them, let alone what it’d be like without them!”

“He’s on meds? Since when?”

“Since the asylum you dumped him in when Lucifer was ripping
apart his head.” Loki snapped. His lip curled up in a sneer at Dean’s stunned
look. “Yeah, I know about that. They might not have been able to help against
big bro, but they helped him with other things. He’s been on a few different
meds since then. You might’ve noticed it if you’d paid any attention.” Then he
turned his sharp glare on the surprisingly quiet Gabriel. “You should’ve noticed. Your mate’s
depressed, suffering from anxiety attacks, and so damn touch starved it makes
my grace scream just being near him.
Why do you think I keep reaching out to touch him? His soul is begging for it
and every time he tries to get some he’s rebuffed. None of you can even let me
touch him casually without trying to take it away from him somehow.”

He saw Dean start to open his mouth and quickly cut off what
he was going to say. “Don’t even say it. When are you going to realize that
Sam’s not like you?” Loki demanded. “He can’t supplement touch by going out and
banging random bar babes like you can, Deano. He’s demisexual. He literally cannot get it up without an emotional
connection. That’s just now how his brain works. Not to mention, he’s pretty
head over heels in love with you, you
giant ass.” That, he directed at
Gabriel, seeming satisfied with the way it made him flinch. “In the three days
that I’ve been here, the only time I’ve seen anyone but me actually touch him
was when you shook him awake at the library table, Dean. Other than that,
nothing. And when I try and do it, you make him feel like it’s bad or wrong or
dirty. If you guys want to kill him so badly, hand him a gun. It’s a lot
faster, and I guarantee you, he won’t have a problem doing it.”

With that last little bomb, Loki vanished from the room with
a loud crack that echoed even after he was gone.

HOLY SHIT WHAT CONVERSATION DID WE HAVE THAT RESULTED IN THIS?? I NEED TO KNOW SO I CAN SAY IT ALL AGAIN BECAUSE I REEEEALLY NEED MUCH MUCH MORE OF THIS FIC ASAP!!!!

I have no idea! I just know that we were talking, cause in my notes it even said “…after talking with River…”

There’s more scene clips in that file, too….

Like:

Loki was sitting on the stone wall and there, curled up
against him, was Sam. Only, it wasn’t the silent Sam that Gabriel had grown
used to seeing. This wasn’t the strong, unbreakable hunter that the rest of the
world got to see. This – this was heartbreaking. Sam was standing between
Loki’s legs with his arms around Loki’s waist and his head against the other
archangel’s shoulder. The way he was curled in on himself, how his shoulders
were shaking, it made Gabriel want to reach out and soothe him. He’d never seen
Sam break like this before.

Over Sam’s shoulder, Loki lifted burning eyes and let them
lock right on Gabriel. He held his gaze as he stroked one hand over Sam’s back
and slid the other hand into the hunter’s hair. When he spoke it was in a low
voice that was just loud enough for Gabriel’s angelic hearing to pick up on.
“It’s okay, Sammy. You’re okay. Go ahead and let it out, I’ve got you.” His
tone was in complete contrast with his furious eyes. When he spoke, his voice
was soft and gentle, soothing. His gaze was the exact opposite.

“S-Sorry.” Sam stammered out. His hands clenched in the
sides of Loki’s jacket like he was afraid the being was going to pull away.
Still, he continued to try and apologize. “S-Sorry… I don’t… I…”

Loki shushed him softly. “I told you, Sammy, you’re fine. I
got you, sweetheart. I’m right here and I’ve got you.” The power in his eyes
flashed, darker and more dangerous. “You’re safe with me. I won’t let them hurt
you. I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

The way that Loki was looking at him made it clear just what
he thought of Gabriel in that moment. It should’ve been him over there making Sam feel better. He should’ve been the one to
come out here after him. To talk him through the anxiety attack he’d obviously
had. He should’ve been the one holding him and protecting him from a world that
seemed to only want to keep kicking him back down each time he tried to get
back up.

Or:

“Why wouldn’t he…”

“When have you ever given him reason to think it’d be safe
to do so?” Loki asked quietly.

“I don’t know how to fix this.”

“You guys did a lot of damage, I’m not gonna lie.” The words
were blunt, yet they were true, and Gabriel knew it. “If you really want to try
and fix this with him, it’s not gonna be easy. He doesn’t see this as you
pushing him away. He hasn’t even entertained the thought of you having feelings
for him. Sam’s pretty much convinced himself that you see him as just as much
an abomination as the rest of the angels do. Too dirty to even be worth being
friends with, let alone anything more. Every time you pulled back from touching
him, he blamed it on him being too dirty for you to want to sully your hands
on.”

Gabriel’s grace throbbed
at that. No. How could Sam think
that?

“Every angel he meets treats him like he’s dirt. The
abomination, the boy king, the boy with the demon blood. Even Castiel thought
like that. In Sam’s eyes, he’s pretty sure the seraph still does.”

“Cas cares about him.”

“Yeah, I can really tell.” Loki said, snorting. “He cares so
much, he pulled Sam out of hell and didn’t even realize his soul wasn’t there.
He broke the wall in Sam’s mind and put him through hell all over again just to
keep Dean from coming after him. He ignored him for a whole year and only came
running after that when Dean called him. Yeah, I can really see the caring in
that. Where exactly is Sam supposed to see anything other than someone who
tolerates him simply because he’s related to Dean?”

OMG, please I want more of this..